Check Please
by owmytrapezoid
Summary: .cough. Oneshot, making it the same sort of horribleness as They Call Me TADR Salad, except with incest, such incest, you won't even notice it, unless you do. If you don't like said pairing feel free to throw a snowball at me and scream BURN THE WITCH!.


"Check Please" 

by Xir(bot)

Summary: -cough- One-shot, making it the same sort of horribleness as They Call Me TADR Salad, except with incest, such incest, you won't even notice it, unless you do. If you don't like said pairing feel free to throw a snowball at me and scream "BURN THE WITCH!". (or just don't read it)

Disclaimer: I don't own nothin'.

Author's Notes: It's a step up with seriousness if you'll compare it to my last fic. Oh yes it is. Most likely because I've gone goth, and because tomorrow I have to leave to visit my hometown in the state of Missouri, which is a place that ironically hates me and wishes I would die. I will be computerless for weeks. O.u Oh, well. If I ever get away from that place again, then expect more crap like this when I do! Yay!

* * *

It was 3:30 again, the last Friday before winter break was to begin. Students scattered out of the skool in celebration, cheers going up from the multitude, the occasional fistful of snow flying through the air at the occasional unsuspecting gleeful child. Smolga was screaming something about how 'SNOW ROOOCKS!'. Torque was happily beating the living daylights of an equally joyous geek-child. Zim was running around in agony in the falling snow, having forgotten his paste that day, and his little green dog was laughing all screamy-like as he chased the Irken. All was right with the world.

Dib was the only kid who stayed behind as the other students filed away from the horrible place. He was leaning against the side of the skool, waiting. He was also watching Zim with no real interest. The little alien had fallen down into the snow and was now writhing in pain as the green dog giggled and ate a snow cone. In the snow, Zim half-laughed, half-screamed, trying to appear normal, but something caught his attention that nearly took his mind off his anguish completely.

The Dib was smiling. Never, since Zim had landed on this planet, had he seen the Dib (i)smile(i). Sure, the human was always there to laugh at his misfortune, but the boy WAS miserable, being insane and all. Today he seemed focused on something else entirely. Zim watched with curiousity as the Dibsister exited the skool with her black umbrella. Instead of simply nodding to acknowledge his existence as she normally did, the Gaz human moved in close to her brother and covered both their faces with the umbrella.

One of Zim's eyes narrowed in confusion.

"NOOO!" Gir screamed so suddenly that Zim nearly jumped out of the snow. "NO MORE SNOWCONE!" the poor robot whined.

Gaz and Dib flinched and looked out from behind their umbrella to see Zim lying there in the snow while his insane dog made snow angels next to him. Zim suddenly remembered how painful this was, but didn't move. Quite sure that they hadn't been seen from behind the umbrella, the two humans started their walk home. Zim cringed and jumped to his feet, and in doing this he realized how much his skin had actually burned. Stupid Earth-weather...

He gazed spitefully over at the retreating Dib-monster. The two siblings were walking away from him, hand-in-hand. Zim lifted a gleeful Gir over his head in order to shield himself from the snowstorm, and then shouted, "Hey DIB human!"

The Dib jumped. He looked over his shoulder, narrowing his eyes when he saw the space-monster. Zim reacted by throwing his fists in the air. "Lies! LIES!"

"...But I didn't say anything." Dib let go of Gaz's hand and turned around to stare at his nemisis, just slightly suprised by his stupidity.

The Dibsister turned to look at the alien with a look of pure loathing. She crossed her arms in annoyance. "If you two don't shut up, I will-"

"CLEVER!" said Zim. "I just thought you should know, Dib-stink..." He hesitated, trying to think of something that would ruin the Dib's whole day. Looking up at the robot, whom was presently eating giant snowflakes hungrily, he chucked. "Gir and I will be obliterating the human race today, and there is nothing you can do about it, you pathetic...Dib!"

Gir giggled insanely the second his master finished his sentence. "YES THERE IS!"

"SILENCE!" Zim dropped the robot to the ground, earning insane laughter from the little drone. He joined in the evil laughter for a few seconds before he was smacked in the face by a snowball. He groaned and fell to the ground as his superior face burned.

Gaz now had an evil grin on her face. She wiped the snow off her hands on her black shirt and then turned to Dib. "I'm leaving with or without you, DIB."

The big head boy himself called over to the burning alien. "In case you haven't noticed, Zim, I haven't even been TRYING to foil you're plans, and you STILL keep failing."

The green boy lifted himself off the ice, coughing up some snow in the process. He was about to say something when he caught Gaz's eye. She held another snowball in her hand and stared back at him with malice. "Yes...well. VICTORY! Victory for Zim! GIR! Take ZIM home!"

"YES MASTER! Cheese!" Gir then screamed insanely as if he was going to turn into some kind of crazy jet of some sort, and then his eyes went blue again and he just took the victorious alien's hand and walked away. "Dodedodedo..."

* * *

The G-D f'ing end. 


End file.
